Updates: Media (lyrics) has a new layout. I could never figure out how to lay it out, but it's easier to navigate now. I'm still working on a better duplicate Mamblog mod. I'm trying to make submittions easier but the poetry form died for some reason. Quizzes are also on their way from the old site. Joomla content isn't very code friendly so I'm having to rewrite old code. You can still click on News > AH v21 > Screen if you wish to use the quizzes.
The world's spinning round and round but all I'm worried about is whether I'll be able to walk the distance to the next room without falling over. This throbbing in my head from lack of caffeine makes everything appear to be in a fourth dimension.
They don't care that there's no place for me to study! I can't get quiet anywhere. They won't let me forget about my cutting. Not for one second. Everyone at the barn allows me to forget. At least for a little while anyways. I can't forget about it anywhere but there. I went to the show today and Joella was there. I couldn't have a conversation with her because I was going to cry. Jeff Metz was also there, as nice and as cute as always. I wonder if he recognized Ren when I took him out to eat grass. I hope so. My eye makeup gets darker as the day goes by if it's been stressful or anxiety-ridden. Today was full of anxiety which only got worse with the coming of night. I can't wait for Joella to move back. She was so good to me.
I was looking at the sunset on my horse this evening and I was swept away. In the foreground the trees, bushes, and structures. Behind them, the rolling and otherwise jagged hills and valleys filled with trails and running streams. And finally the blue pink mountains peaking out to take a look at the magnificence above. The storm clouds mixed with a rainbow and a lonely leprechaun's gold gleamed from below. I desired to walk beyond the rolling hills and blue pink mountain tops to reach the most beautiful place on earth. Like there was an end to the sky, to the earth, and to this destination for peace. Then my conscience spoke aloud to me, woke me up, opened my eyes to the fact that I live in a life with people who don't give a fuck about me or any of this crap that runs through my head.
So Sandra and I crossed paths today and she knew who I was!! I just gave her the key and when I went to lower Coons this morning I couldn't find rm109 but this guy was walking out of his office so I asked him and he didn't know where it was and pointed me to 111. the lady in there gave me the paper I needed. I filled it out and returned it ten minutes later. I had to register today and I'm in a panic because it won't let me register for a class but it will let me register for it's lab (???). I didn't want to call the registrar but after my mother left for work I calmed down and just called them like it was no big deal. They told me what I had to do but now I have to back to lower Coons to get a paper, get my Calculus Professor to sign it and bring it back so that the computer will let me register for the class (Physics 110). Also, the schedule is really messed up compared to how I wanted it and it conflicts with Monday appointments and Wednesday and Friday lessons. I have no idea what Cyndi is going to say about that. She thinks riding comes before school whereas I believe school comes before everything else.
Worry not my little friend Life's great fears will some day end
Maybe I ended that one because I don't really believe it
Ricky: It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air you can almost hear it and this bag was just dancing with me like a little kid beggin' me to play with it for fifteen minutes that's the day I realized that there was this entire life behind things and this incredibly benevolent force wanted me to know that there was no reason to be afraid ever video's a poor excuse I know but it helps me remember I need to remember sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it and my heart is just going to cave in.
Double click any word on this page for a definition.
Using Firefox? Enable definitions by downloading the extension. Sorry, this feature does not currently work in Opera or Safari.
