| Written by Diana, on 24-07-2002 22:03 |
| Views |
82  |
|
|
|
July 24, 2002 (9:03pm)
with ice running through my veins, keeping me bundled up in record heat, fear grips me like it did that day so long ago. once again, a little pre-maturely, i''m fearing for my life and once again no one seems to want to calm my nerves. and when i'm through this i'll continue to starve because it's been made clear to me that i'm in control of nothing else. i did not lose weight today and i'm okay with that, but when i look in the mirror i see two things. i see fat, but i also see someone who has reason to be afraid. i walk to my car in the empty lot on campus shaking in my boots. it's true i'm socially phobic but i'm also afraid to be alone. unless i'm confined by walls i trust, i just can't seem to find the strength to walk, unaware or unsure of my surroundings. i must always be watching, waiting, expecting the worst to manifest itself at any moment in time. oh it's so fun being me *wink*
Last update: 24-07-2002 22:03
Users' Comments (0) 
|
|
|
Words 
