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marriage then children vs. children then marriage |
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| Written by Diana, on 27-06-2005 01:56 |
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There's this guy at work (as some of you may remember) who is totally sweet and funny and cute. He's 24 and works the same hours I work (much to my enjoyment), 11:15am-7:45pm for him and 11:30am-8:00pm or 9:00pm for me. He has a girlfriend which I've always known but it's totally fun to have a nice guy just to hang around with occasionally. Well his girlfriend has a 5yr old daughter and now she's pregnant. Somehow, the day I overheard that, he turned not very cute anymore. 24, not married, and his girlfriend's pregnant. I guess it's just how I grew up, but that doesn't seem fair to the child. It seems like an unstable relationship makes a child feel unstable. I don't know why it bothered me so much, there are many strange relationships going on at the office that just don't seem natural, but I guess he seemed better than that. If it was a girl I'd feel the same way, don't get me wrong. The same feeling came over me when my 25yr old co-worker told me she had a 9yr old son and was engaged to a 34yr old man. I mean what is it with people these days? What happened to marriage in your mid to late 20's, a few years later you have kids, when your marriage is stable? I'm not a religious person, I don't believe you'll go to hell or anything if you have children out of wedlock but for the development of the child (and out of simple smarts) I've always belived in marriage then kids. Not kids and then MAYBE marriage down the line. It seems a little backwards. My whole office seems to have had their first child in their teens and either weren't married at the time or have since devorced the person they married at a young age. There are a couple women in their 40's who have never married and have several cats but I honestly don't know ... more than one or two people who are part of the "typical" relationship that you would think of. Not that those peole are better than all the others, just that it's strange to me how the "norm" has changed so drastically. I just had to get that off my chest.
Last update: 27-06-2005 01:56
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