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it's calling me. i can hear it. |
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| Written by Diana, on 28-03-2004 00:48 |
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There's a guy who works in the same building as me who thinks I'm "gorgeous". All I can think is that he saw me from a far...and he needs glasses. He spent about two weeks calling up a friend of his, a girl I work with, asking her to tell me things and ask me things and to call him. I've never seen this guy, or met him. I know he's tall and black, Christian, and very shy. Given that I'm a firm believer that religion's all in your head, I think that's a good sign that we weren't made for each other. On top of that, he wants me to call him, even though he's the one who's obsessed, and I've never even seen him. He says I smiled at him but I smile at everyone, it's a polite thing to do. He's afraid I won't like him and I'm afraid he won't like me so here we are. I need someone who's a talker anyhow, because regardless of how comfortable I get, I never talk more than I do when I first meet someone. Which is very little. I'm not chatty. There just aren't many thoughts in my head. I wanted to cut yesterday with the news of a supervisor "adjustment" at work. I wanted to cut today because my mother talked about my therapist like she wasn't responsible. And I want to cut now for the principle of it. My therapist made an effort to take everything I had that was sharp but the other day I found something, in a place I never would have thought to look. It's calling me. I can hear it.
Last update: 28-03-2004 00:48
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